12-20-2006, 07:56 PM
Golf
1. An inefficient attempt to direct an uncontrollable sphere into an inaccessible hole with instruments ill-adapted for the purpose.
2. An expensive way of playing marbles.
Abstainer
A weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
Absurdity
A statement of belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion.
Accident
A condition in which presence of mind is good but absence of body is better.
Accountant
Someone who comes to a different conclusion when he adds up your expenses.
Accuracy
The vice of being right.
Adder
Mathematically inclined snake.
Adolescents
Children old enough to dress by themselves if they could just remember where they last saw their clothes.
Adore
To venerate expectantly.
Adult
A person who has stopped growing at both ends and started growing in the middle.
Adult Education
Something that will continue as long as kids have home work.
Advertisement
What gets people on the bandwagon.
Advertising
The science of arresting the human intelligence for long enough to get money from it.
Afternoon
That part of the day we spend worrying about how we wasted the morning.
Alarm clock
A device used to wake up people who don’t have small children.
Alliance
In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other’s pocket that they cannot separately plunder a third.
Alphabet
The most aggressive wager on the table.
Ambassador
An honest man sent to lie abroad for the good of the state.
Amber
A bright yellowish gold colour which is invisible when on traffic lights.
Ambidextrous
Able to pick with equal skill a right hand pocket or a left.
Amnesia
Condition that enables a woman, who has gone through labor, to have sex again.
Ant
A busy insect that still finds time to go to picnics.
Anxiety
Anxiety: The first time you can’t do it a second time.
Panic: A second time you can’t do it the first time.
Approbation
Fear of early release from prison.
Argument
An exchange of ignorance.
Assassination
Extreme form of censorship.
Atheism
Non-prophet organization.
Atheist
A man who has no invisible means of support.
Automobile
A four wheeled vehicle that runs up hills and down pedestrians.
1. An inefficient attempt to direct an uncontrollable sphere into an inaccessible hole with instruments ill-adapted for the purpose.
2. An expensive way of playing marbles.
Abstainer
A weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
Absurdity
A statement of belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion.
Accident
A condition in which presence of mind is good but absence of body is better.
Accountant
Someone who comes to a different conclusion when he adds up your expenses.
Accuracy
The vice of being right.
Adder
Mathematically inclined snake.
Adolescents
Children old enough to dress by themselves if they could just remember where they last saw their clothes.
Adore
To venerate expectantly.
Adult
A person who has stopped growing at both ends and started growing in the middle.
Adult Education
Something that will continue as long as kids have home work.
Advertisement
What gets people on the bandwagon.
Advertising
The science of arresting the human intelligence for long enough to get money from it.
Afternoon
That part of the day we spend worrying about how we wasted the morning.
Alarm clock
A device used to wake up people who don’t have small children.
Alliance
In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other’s pocket that they cannot separately plunder a third.
Alphabet
The most aggressive wager on the table.
Ambassador
An honest man sent to lie abroad for the good of the state.
Amber
A bright yellowish gold colour which is invisible when on traffic lights.
Ambidextrous
Able to pick with equal skill a right hand pocket or a left.
Amnesia
Condition that enables a woman, who has gone through labor, to have sex again.
Ant
A busy insect that still finds time to go to picnics.
Anxiety
Anxiety: The first time you can’t do it a second time.
Panic: A second time you can’t do it the first time.
Approbation
Fear of early release from prison.
Argument
An exchange of ignorance.
Assassination
Extreme form of censorship.
Atheism
Non-prophet organization.
Atheist
A man who has no invisible means of support.
Automobile
A four wheeled vehicle that runs up hills and down pedestrians.
ignrofl: